The
Gundagai Times and Tumut, Adelong and Murrumbidgee District Advertiser NSW
Friday 30 June 1876
Jottings by Jetsam.
Down in Sydney it would
seem as though we are preparing for a surprise— for what may come— for what
will come, nothing surer if the programme embraces “Let slip the dogs of war.”
It is a remarkable sign
of the times— of a common' impending fate— that the “lion shows a strong disposition
to lie down with the lamb”;
for not one dissentient voice has yet been heard,
even the 'mild' journals have been galvanised;
the key-note has been struck,
and the tocsin of war is sounding in the metropolis; the cry everywhere is—
“Britannia hoists
the warning—
“Against the storm
prepare.”
Groups of excited men
may be seen at the corners of streets discoursing fast and furious, and using
gestures wild.
As for me, I was
positively frightened this week by Sir Hercules Robinson’s statement at the
recent University ceremonial.
His Excellency remarked
that the colony of N.S.W. has a balance of thirteen millions of cash growing
blue-mouldy in the banks and Treasury coffers, and that the colony has an
annual sea-borne trade
in merchandise valued at twenty-seven millions
sterling.
Is this a time
to 'blow' of our
miss-used riches — our
imports and exports?
Are we not inviting attacks to furnish, some, of the sinews of war?
Our do-nothing Ministry have certainly tried
to get the sister colonies to join in the expense of laying down a second cable—
and moreover, wildly invite them also to join in running' a fast steamer from
Java to give us news from Europe at intervals of eleven days —
And so far
this is good; but what on earth' do they mean by scratching up a few sand heaps
across the Botany road?
Do they think
an enemy will come that way!
The Enemy is
within the gates already, and her name is Procrastination and Incompetence!
What is our
best if it takes this direction? Now in your time, Messieurs of the Opposition,
the day and the hour has come, shall the man be wanting?
I hold that no reliance can be placed in the
Robertson -cum- Garrett cabinet, since
they recommend as a Parliamentary argument the slinging about of empty
bottles.' Borne burning —Nero
fiddling.
This country going to the dogs and the Premier talks of 'empty bottles,' thus metaphorically if
not actually, drinking dry sillery and claret in the Refreshment room
meanwhile.
General U.
S. Grant—now the American President — asked one of his aides de-camp for a
piece of lead pencil in a dire emergency on the battle-field that he might
write an order to one of his field-officers ; not one of the staff could
furnish an inch of such a commodity; and Grant's dignified rebuke was:-
' Well,
gentlemen, I want to open a bottle of whisky,' and each man produced a pocket corkscrew
— the soft impeachment, you see, was admittedly right; so is John right.
Empty
bottles, was it? Quite right, dear old
boy, and very apropos.
No foreign
iron-clad could come into Port Jackson, of course not, her captain would
tremble at the thought of the 'powder-booms and torpedoes which are not there, nor
would any modern officer try such a dare-devil game.
He would prefer sending a dignified message by
boat or steam-launch (covered by open ports and grinning 600-pounders) that he
required five or six of the blue-mouldy millions kept so handy, failing to receive
which, he would have an afternoon's amusement in shelling the city, leaving en-route
to pay a visit to all the ports from Twofold to Moreton Bays; we should soon
hear that the fair city of Newcastle, and all the shipping found there, were in
flames.
What about
our boasted commerce then, without a ship from one end of our coastline to the
other?
And what precautions are we taking? Scratching up a little sand on the Botany
road.' I had fondly hoped, till' now, that', 'Prevention is better than cure.'
Let us sleep a little longer till the crash comes, and then cry, Pecavi! Pecavi.
A few booms
and torpedoes 'might help us—but what matter?
The banks
and merchant princes, too, seem still asleep.
I hope the awakening will not be
too rough.
You know of the legacy my grandmother left me recently ; well, to
soon as I hear of war being declared (perhaps sooner) I intend to take a spring
cart around to my bank for the cash, with' a view to transferring my account.
Oh ! for the
payment of M.P.'s ; what a chance I would have, in a country where all that is
required is for—
''Ministers
to draw large salaries,
And
to travel free in trains;
Singing hip! hip hurrah! for N.S. Wales.
'For she beats the world for brains! “
Go on, New
South Wales, Viva La bagatelle.
JETSAM. .
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